Conséquences vs Présence.

Cormoran Lee
9 min readApr 27, 2019

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Close your eyes.

Open your eyes.

Nothing happened.

Conclusion: Stop worrying and start whooping.

One day of your shrinking life you’ll be wondering how many moments went down the trash just because you can’t seem to understand how life is ridiculously short.

The average person lives 27,375 days. Sounds like a big cake, but someone might come and snack all of it in one second.

Epictetus (a philosopher that was born as a slave) shook my being when declared 2000+ years ago:

“Most of the people complain that life is too short, but even 1000 years for most of them won’t be enough because they do not master The Art of Living”

What’s The Art of Living? Cutting the crap! Simple as that.

When I was very young I used to worry so much about how much time is left for me in this world. I used to paint, scratch and mark in whatever possible way the dates, so I could be more aware of how fast this time passed by. IT WAS VANDALISM and unnecessary and I won’t recommend to anyone but I am still overwhelmed by how fast those marks disappeared and how much time swept by.. and as for me, in the meantime, my age has doubled.

Mindful is the new desired state — but how exactly do we translate that into action?

Mindless is the new enemy.. — but it works very easily, and if you get along well, it could become your best friend.

A quick test for you to take (I took it yesterday)

  1. Take a piece of paper and write down 3 crazy things you want to do.
  2. Write down why you want to do those 3 things.
  3. Write down why you don’t do those 3 things.
  4. If you feel FOMO after that, do some more homework.

Bull$hitting ourselves again?

Finding unreasonable excuses?

Hiding behind mama’s pillows?

Life is too short, you can’t worry all the time about what might happen..

So what are we so mindful about?

Empty your mind from the nonsense you’re so focused on and release all the steam.

Can you act as a puppy for once? After all, we all want to fool around and feel lighthearted right?

So shed the old skin of your mature and responsible person and starting doing what you feel like you doing right here right now.

I didn’t say taking every opportunity and every chance, I just said, allow yourself to mistake, enjoy the moment — Worst case scenario is being moved by fear — That for the long term will shut your real self that is screaming for life.

What will separate the awesome you from the rest of the miserable world is one simple thing- think less, do more.

Yes, you’re allowed to feel, to feel enthusiastic, to feel in love, to feel stupid, to feel spontaneous, to feel whatever you feel and act upon it.

Today I am 32 years old and I can write you a list of more than 100 cases that I over-thought of, and the end I have allowed life to escape through my fingers.

“It was 2012, I was restless and exhilarated. Koh Tao — A tiny Thai island. I was after 10 months of travelling around Asia, doing my Freediving Instructor course. Beach party, late at night, fire stuns, deep sand and good times. I noticed the most adorable girl sitting on the sand. I counted to 3 and approached her as I usually do (reminding myself how life is short) I was amazed by her charm and our chemistry, I didn’t meet a girl like her for months.. even years.We took a group picture so I invited her to help us taking it, we started talking and getting closer..Before I knew it, a nervous guy approached us and introduced himself as her boyfriend. I thought to myself: hmm that is strange.. as I feel I am speaking to an angel from the skies that landed especially to meet me here. She disappeared for 30 minutes.. so I went dancing with my friends.. Our sights crossed again, she came to speak to me and apologized for the strange situation. She was ferious around him and glowing around me.. I wasn’t sure what’s going on but they seem to be on the verge of a break up. As I always try to be on top of my game and stay respectful for everyone, I was in a conflict — IS IT ALLOWED to keep on speaking with her? It was love at first sight and I felt goosebumps all over my body and fairly confused. I wanted to stay in touch with this girl but I just couldn’t ask for her Email, number or FB as it seems out of the limit. Before I knew it, the boyfriend came again extremely jealous and pulled her arm away.. she game that ‘I am sorry look’ and went away with him. I never saw her again and couldn’t track back her contacts since I had only her first name that I didn’t even know how to spell correctly.”

Was it a wasted night, opportunity, love, friend for life? It doesn’t really matter.

The point of the story you understood, but the point that I shared this boring story with you holds a greater lesson here.

Should I be worrying about the quality of my content because it might not be good enough? Good enough for what>>>

Who cares really?

Yes, I care for you and your reading experience, but I will never become a proficient writer while worrying about what I deliver right?

The most important thing is to deliver, thoughts in my lil brain won’t make any impact and won’t ever come to life.

Epictetus also wrote:

“If you want to be a writer, write.”

I absolutely love this one as it expresses the importance of practice and of action.

Listen, I am not a pro, and definitely not smarter than you. What I try to do is to realize what’s this roller-coaster is all about.. between loop to loop I freeze the moment, blog about it and reflect on while massaging my balls to see if they get bigger or smaller. If they hide I know something is wrong.

You want fresh stories, I’ll bring you fresh stories —

Last night, I have met a girl that I was talking to on the phone for the last 2 months. (We saw each other only once by chance) We have such a strong connection — It feels real. We had some quality time together, sipping some tea and talking about life.. My magnetic field was trying to pull her onto my arms.. I remembered something that a friend told me just a few days ago: “When you have a strong connection with someone and you know it’s for real, skip society’s structure for how relationships should look like and skip your evolutionary need to breed (have wild sex) It is allowed to cuddle and be intimate without jumping into agreements or worrying about the consequences” (I am going to write a whole blog about it soon) I told her how I feel and asked to hug her. She gave me a short hug while explaining how many things can go wrong if we are going to let this hug prolong. I was touching my head and knocking on the back door of my reptilian brain asking: “What danger are we facing here? The inner reptile said- Continue, all good.”

Whatever, another night in this short life passed by worrying about tomorrow.

Rapping part, enjoy —

“What are we doing in this lifetime if we are holding oursleves from expressing the most special moments. Real emotions, real connections, real life. Are you going to wait for next life-time? Are you going to skip many of those moments because you tend to believe they are dangerous for the mid-long term? But what about right now? what about what you’re feeling right now? isn’t that count the most? Tomorrow it might rain and you’ll have a new passion and a new lover, so what? don’t cry over things evolving because finally you are present and you take your pudding brain and you do something about it, you use those free cells in the back of your brain to think less, to feel more, to do the extra mile- all the joy of life is behind, behind the scenes, broken screens, flight mode, flow state, beach break, sandy hugs, rolling laughter, nothing o’clock, nothing tomorrow, whatever tomorrow, whatever yesterday, whatever happens you’re not afraid, you’re not afraid to trial, to fail, to cry, to try, to listen, to fall in love, to say goodbye, to say what’s up I smash this night like it were my last, and if it isn’t your last, it is another gift from above, not above the earth or god or anything too mysterious, but a present from you, from the daring, down to earth, fun and still aware you. So pleaseeeee shall we disconnet a little bit from what might happen and start to go for our inner volacanos that are begging for expression, eruption, explosion… our days are passing by and before we know it, we feel drained, we feel like we didn’t follow what our hearts were screaming for us to do, every year they scream something else, cool, it flows, like nature. Do it today because tomorrow brings more storms and more problems and more excitements, so let’s cruise for the sunset, put some lounge caribbean music, eat some rotten too sweet bananas and kiss this moment so wildly.. The sunset is gone now, it’s cold, you’re old, you’re wondering, you drink another cappuchino and you open the news feed, everyone is pretending to live such a life, and you, what are you doing today that makes you jump out of your seat? Very soon in your dark carbonated coffin, you’ll wake up sipping one more liter of air, just enough to open your eyes and shed a muddy tear, crying for this broken roller coaster you never took, the young booty you never dared to publicly shook, and the acting classes you never booked. Oh such a shame.. but you’re talking all day about dreams, startups, travels and the person you want to become — Can’t you see it’s happening now? To start your own company doesn’t mean you live to the fullest and not a month vacation in the bahamas.. what you should really do is get your ass bumping and singing because you’re reading my horrible writings and you’re breathing, you’re confused, you’re wasting you’re time, what a privilege.. to surf in the internet and do nothing.. absolutely nothing.. so just do me a favor here ok, if you want to spend some quality time, make sure you put a mask on, you forget your watch at home and we’re going to forget all about what might go wrong? what did I say? whoopsy it’s not allowed in this club, the club of freedom. Fear out, freedom in, worries out, fun in, you’re in my arms, you’re out of my arms. You wake up, all good, you’re still alive, maybe not, maybe zombie like, maybe it’s time to go now and quit this fantastic rapping because my fingers are tired from typing, I didn’t stop for one second, and it feels great, it’s liberating, it’s freeing my brain to think deeply and to paint new horizons on the toilet’s door while I am cleaning my body from the $hit it’s been producing”

Maybe I have a problem and I think super weirdly but don’t come to me in 10 years time and ask me how I did it ok?! I promise you will be wondering because I’m not here on this planet to let this life go by like butter on a piece of a gluten free bread.

Why everyone goes to gamble? Uses drugs? Pays big money for services and therapies? Saves money to take a tropical vacation to run away from this boring life? Follows a fake Instagram model? Goes to watch an action movie?

Oh pleaseeeeeee, think again. I am not going to remind you or trying to convince you. maybe I will, but with some proper spanking.

This is your movie and your days are short, oh mama, so short.

I am going to be whooping, do you want to join the ride, SO YOU BETTER put your mask on because we are going to create a nasty ugly Bollywood one..And you probably won’t like to be seen like that on your Instush story.

Everyone is starring in this movie. And you?

And you’re just going to stand there behind the scenes, pretending, playing with your phone, being mindful…………….?

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Cormoran Lee
Cormoran Lee

Written by Cormoran Lee

I pour my heart involuntarily into words, since I found that writing is the ultimate solution for a nightmarish sailing journey. I can still connect with you :)

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